Nice photo

Posted



The Top 5 Answer. Given by girls in India wen a boy Propose.

1)No

2)R u mad

3)I Always looked u like a gud frnd

4)I dnt belive in love

5)Sorry I love sm1


Ouch! It's too tight.
Don't worry,sweetheart ! We'll try to do it slowly.Push it in .

Aah!  I  can't. It's painful.
Ok,sweetheart, Let's get another......... WEDDING RING

wedding

Posted

Attending a wedding for the first time,
A little girl whispered to her mother,
"Why is the bride dressed in white?"  

"Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life."
Her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple.  
The child thought about this for a moment,then said,
" So, why is the groom wearing black?"




Jack  decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded  up Jack's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard.  So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.

"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained. "I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."

"Don't worry," Jack said. "We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."

The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way.

They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.

But about nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes  to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had  met on the ski weekend.

He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, "Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north ab out 9 months ago ?"

"Yes, I do." said Bob

"Did you, er, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?"

"Well, um, yes!," Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, "I have to admit that I did."

"And  did you happen to give her my name instead  of telling her your name?"

Bob's  face turned beet red and he said, "Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"

"She just died and left me everything."




A Boss looking through his Mail Box was astonished to see a mail from
an Employee who was supposed to be busy working at Client side on a
critical project. It had the subject - "TaTa - Bye Bye". With the
worst premonition he opened the mail and read the content with
trembling hands:-

Dear Sir,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you, but I'm
leaving the job. The offer was too lucrative and attractive for me to
turn down. I had to abscond because I wanted to avoid a scene with the
HR and you. I am sorry but I had no choice.

The project is working fine. There are only 108 issues pending, out of
which only 38% issues are High Priority. Hence I am sure there is no
need to worry about. The next Phase of major enhancements I have been
working upon, have been completed halfway. I am sure the new person
who would replace me would not understand what all I had done so far.
Hence, for his and your convenience, I have taken care to remove all
the work that I had been doing this far for nearly 3 months now. I am
sure you will appreciate my insight and "big heart".

I am of course retaining the Originals that I had retrieved for the
purpose of Passport verification with me, considering it as a parting
gift from you. Of course, I will not pay the bond amount that I owe
the company (since I Am breaking the bond). But I will consider this
as a parting gift from our Dear company. I moving out of town since
the new company is situated in another City.

Also, I have changed my contact number. So you will not be able to get
in touch with me, to congratulate me. But I know your blessings are
always with me. Last but not the least. I also have the Rs 12000
entrusted to me by our company's cultural events group, for the
upcoming movie event. I am sure you would have wanted me to keep it
with myself as an added bonus from our company. I respect you very
much, hence your wish is my command.

Don't worry sir. I am 2 years experienced now, learning so much from
your company. So I will surely use this knowledge to write better
programs for the new company. Someday I'm sure we will meet sometime
in the future. If you wish, I will surely be glad to give my employee
reference for you to apply for a job in the new company which I am
joining.

Your faithful employee,
S. W. Engineer

At the bottom of the page were the letters "PS". Hands still
trembling, the Boss read:

PS: Dearest Boss, none of the above is true. I'm am still busy working
at client side. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse
things in life than my "Request to reconsider my Salary Appraisal"
attached with this mail. Please approve it and call when it is safe
for me to come to our Office to discuss this.

My respect and Best Regards to you!

Thanks & regards,


1)  NUDITY

I was driving with my three young children one warm  summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead   of us stood up and waved.  

She was stark naked! As I  was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old   shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

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2) OPINIONS

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his   teacher a note from his mother.

The note read,   "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

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3) KETCHUP

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the  jar.

During her struggle the phone rang so she  asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.  "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

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4) MORE NUDITY  

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in  the women's locker room.

When he was spotted, the   room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.  

The little boy watched in   amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

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5) POLICE # 1

While taking a routine vandalism report at an  elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl  about 6 years old.  Looking up and down at my uniform,

she asked, "Are you a cop?" Yes," I  answered and continued writing the report. "My  mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the  police.  Is that right? "Yes, that's right," I told her.  "Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

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6) POLICE # 2  

It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment,  

my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little  boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back  there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the  van. Finally he said," What'd he do?"

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7) ELDERLY  

While working for an organization that delivers  lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my  4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.  She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and  wheelchairs.  

One day I found her staring at a pair of  false teeth soaking in a glass.  As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she  merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy  will never believe this!"

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8) DRESS-UP

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a  party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she  warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."

"And  why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you  a headache the next morning."

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9) DEATH  

While walking along the sidewalk in front of his  church, our minister heard the intoning of a  prayer that nearly made his collar wilt.  Apparently,  his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a  dead robin.

Feeling that proper burial should be  performed, they had secured a small box and cotton  batting , then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.  The minister's son was  chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with  sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he  thought his father always said:  "Glory be unto the  Faaaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he  gooooes."

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10) SCHOOL

A little girl had just finished her first week of  school.  "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her  mother .. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

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11) BIBLE

A little boy opened the big family bible.  He was  fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.  

Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible.  He picked  up the object and looked at it.  What he saw was an   old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages   "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.  ;  ; "What have you got there, dear?"  

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think  it's  Adam's underwear."